Hello Friends,
maybe some of you are confused and wondering who I am. This time I want to
explain who I am and my condition (although I can only give a little
information). Next, please read my memoir. Okey๐
My
name is Luna. I am a woman suffering from alexithymia due to a case of C-PTSD which
was treated too late when I was a victim of social conflict in my country in
1999. I am unable to see someone's expressions, emotions and face
completely, I don't even know my own face. I can only see other people's
eyeballs and also my own eyeballs. There is a saying that says 'The eyes are
the window to the soul'. It is said that when we look into someone's eyes we
can see the deepest part of their heart. But that doesn't seem to apply to me.
I don't have the ability to find that window of the soul. I do have eyes but
whether I have a soul anymore or not, it seems like I don't have any
anymore. (That's why my book entitles The Dead Soul Eyes)
In my
book talks about the life of a woman who is considered foreign and strange
because of limitations in terms of human interaction (itโs me). How I face
every challenge and difficulty. How I live, make any life decisions in a way
that most people would never expect as a normal person, mostly related to my
'special' condition, will be explained from my point of view. And I'm proud to
do it.
Within
my limitation, I can be an inspiration to other people, especially people who
look 'different' and who are considered 'useless' by social standards and norms
in my country - the neurodivergent group because I am pure projector
synesthete, I am able to see colors, shapes and frequency of someone talking to me in 3D floating before my
eyes literally, (as a survival mechanism)-.
I have
a mission, that every person who 'looks different' has their own story that is
worth hearing. How does the human rights motto that says everyone has the right
to live not seem to be enough for those who are different - including people
with disabilities and the types of people who are considered trash -, that
those who look 'different' are still alive and look alive but need more than
what they see? still alive. They need the โright to be acceptedโ properly.
I am
indeed one type of "special" living human phenomenon in my country. I
went through many good and bad experiences and I survived in my 'different'
way. I really like being me.
I don't make this memoir so I can become rich and famous! Remember that!
I wrote this book so that my voice, my kinds can be โseenโ and our voices โheardโ!!
What about you guys? Do you like being yourself?
By the way, I really love my life....
I hope you love yours, too๐